Keep on datin’ in the free world…
I am FINALLY back! This has been pretty much the most intensive 3 months of work that I have ever engaged in but it is DONE! Normal service will now resume.
The fact that neither Toast nor I have actually managed any dates of late and that I’ve been too busy to even keep myself in basic fitness (I’ve put on a STONE! before Jesus-mas I was in peak physical condition but now I face the uphill battle of getting it all back. Mostly for me, but it’s also handy with dates should you find yourself sans vêtements [in the buff]).
This is going to be a bit of a retrospective since I’m so far behind.
Probably the most significant thing is the development with Cupcake. As mentioned recently, I had a bit of the traditional post breakup hijinks with Cupcake, and rather fun it was. However it obviously does nothing to further my emotional progress and marriage plans.
Well, we met up again, this time for cream teas in a lovely local tea shoppe; the kind where anyone over 5’9″ has to duck to avoid the wooden beam sand to pass through doorways. We talked we reminisced, we then went back to mine and got very naked for quite some time.
We hugged a lot. We missed each other a LOT. There were apologies for the bad behaviour on her part and acceptance of the largest part of the responsibility for it all going horribly wrong. There were tears (Yes, from me too) and we said our goodbyes.
This would all be neither here nor there as on the face of it appears to be perpetuation of the same unhealthy cycle. However this time things were different. For the first time EVER I realised I was no longer cross or angry at her for what she had done. This is SUCH an emotional release. We wanted to be with each other but both know that it was just too far gone. The relationship was broken and no amount of ruby-slipper clicking was going to make it work.
It’s probably the closest I’ve come to an epiphany. It means I can FINALLY let go. This is all rather ‘serious’ stuff but it’s the most significant post break-up progress I’ve made. So, in summary, I can move on.
To celebrate this progress I have started to line up some dates. Rather than follow my old route of trying to get dates with girls who I think will have the characteristics that I think I want, I’m going to try and date out of that ‘type’. This means no more looking for Cupcake replacements! (Not even if I THINK I want something delicious and sugary but which is actually rather naughty. And no girls who come in crinkled paper cups either).
Currently in the offing is a date with an Actual Real Girl that I know in real life (note, this is not the girl mentioned atthe end of the post here, that all rather fell through and perhaps more on that another time. That’s right, I do know more than 1 Actual Real Girl who is prepared to date me so I can’t be all bad!) and several girls from the interspaz (assuming that the Internet Rats don’t start nibbling on their messages).
The first is pencilled in for this weekend. I will update with the rest of the dating plans SOON!
April is going to be a very, VERY expensive month. *eats baked beans on jacket potato*.